It never fails. Less than a week after school lets out for the summer, my friends begin complaining about summer boredom. It’s hard for me to understand, since I have only experienced boredom once (at a Beige Festival I was taken to as an infant that resulted in my au pair Cannelloni being permanently let go). But I have done my best to draw on that experience to come up with some summer boredom busters to help my friends. Because I’m generous like that.
1. Explore the Great Outdoors
Summer is a perfect opportunity to get in touch with nature by booking a five-star resort in an exotic location. Not only will the background in your selfies be enviable, there’s no better way to get outside your comfort zone than to randomly pick a spa package written another language. Oh, the possibilities!
2. Arts & Crafts
Art nourishes the soul. I like to get in touch with my creative side by having a portrait commissioned every summer. Few things are as fulfilling as seeing a completed masterpiece and telling the painter that, actually, you’ve changed your mind and you’d like him to start over with a different pose. Priceless!
3. Visit the Library
It’s important to keep one’s mind connected to the written word when school is out of session. That’s why I have a personal scribe write out the entire transcript of my life and have it bound into individual books on a regular basis. At least once a week, I like to take a trip to my private library and pick a volume off the shelf and have it read to me. It’s amazing the things I learn from myself!
4. Arrange Activities with Friends
If you’re bored, chances are someone else is too. Play dates are the ultimate remedy for boredom, so I always recommend contacting a dozen of your closest friends and inviting them to do something extravagant and expensive. Whether it’s herding hired llamas through a friend’s penthouse or getting dressed up and going outside for an afternoon of Jolie-Pitting (with or without any Jolie-Pitts – your choice), you’re bound to have a great time.
5. Go to a Park
Nothing beats a little fresh air, so pack a picnic and head to a lavish spot of Nature’s green carpet. Any royal palace garden will do. Versailles is lovely this time of year, though I’d recommend bringing some air conditioning. Sweat is ew.