Now, I’m about to reveal something deeply personal, so lean in close. The thing is, I have a hard time saying “thank you.” I literally have a difficult time forming the words and speaking them. For years, it was thought to be a strange, phrase-specific speech impediment, but it turns out that I just find it terribly unnatural to express gratitude.

BUT! Since I am determined to be the best at everything I do, I have found a way to work around this and become extremely gracious (and humble). I focus on thankful actions, and since actions speak louder than words, it basically means that I am the best at Thanksgiving.

In the event that you would like to up your gratitude game, here are my top five ways to give thanks:

1. Write a note to someone who has gone the extra mile for you. Last week, I handed a beautiful card to my au pair Fontanelle, thanking her for always remembering to fluff my pillow exactly half-way through the night.

2. Offer to do something special for someone that they can’t do for themselves. For example, I give frequent makeovers to friends and even strangers on the street. The look on their face when I ambush them says it all. I can see that they are just as thankful as I am to be able to offer this service.

3. Report good service to superiors. If someone goes the extra mile to serve you, let their supervisor know. It could help them get recognition, new responsibility, even a raise! My part-time male model mannies do such a great job, and I am always telling myself that.

4. Encourage people to fulfill their dreams. Sometimes the difference between falling and flying is someone giving a loving nudge. Or a shove.

5. Spend money that gives back. If you are gifted at shopping as I am, you can get gratitude brownie points by purchasing items that give back for you. For example, a purchase of a sharp new backpack by State Bags results in a second back-pack full of supplies being given to someone in need.

If you listen to my advice and try these tips, I guarantee you will become a more thankful person like me. (I can’t guarantee that you will be as humble.) And when you realize this transformation, don’t forget to thank me for it. A handwritten note will be fine.